The Hard Choice
by Projectcompassion
Summary: Beck and Jade realize that they have a problem and they have to make some hard choices


Disclaimer: I don't own Victorious

This story takes place a few days after the stupid "time out" scene and is told from Beck's point of view in bold and Jade's point of view in italics.

* * *

 **Jade was painting her fingernails black when I came up to her. She and I were obviously having problems and I didn't understand why. We needed to talk.**

 _Beck tapped me on the shoulder._

 _"Do you not see that I'm doing my nails," I said annoyed._

 _"I see that," he said, "But we need to talk."_

 _"Fine," I said, "What do you need to talk about?"_

 _"I feel like something is wrong with our relationship," Beck said, "and I don't know how to make it right."_

 **Jade always acted like it was my fault so I had to find out what I was doing but what she said next surprised me.**

 _"It's not all you," I told Beck, "It's just as much my fault as it is yours. I'm not able to trust people so easily. I have been hurt by so many people so I don't know how to deal with feelings of anxiety or anger. It's my defense mechanism to be offensive so I don't have to be defensive again. I don't know what else to do."_

 **I knew Jade had been through a lot but I felt that she should just get over it because it had been a long time ago. I was so proud of her for admitting she was partly responsible for our problems. But I knew that I was partly responsible too and I knew she wasn't going to let me off so easily. It wasn't like her.**

 _"It's also you," I added._

 _Beck looked at me with expectation._

 _"How? Can you give me an example?"_

 _I nodded. I could give him several._

 _"I think the best example would be the other day. Beck it was our 2 year anniversary and because some guy... Ryder something or other was taking advantage of Tori you put off our anniversary and instead decided we would go warn Tori."_

 **Yeah I admit that was tactless but Tori was my friend and I didn't want to see her get hurt.**

 _"You also did something earlier that day that you knew would piss me off."_

 _Beck nodded. He couldn't deny that because it was obviously true._

 _"I didn't think," he said._

 _"Clearly," I replied, "But that doesn't mean what you did was okay. You know what I went through in the past and you know I'm insecure and certain things scare me so what do you do? You specifically do those things. I don't know why you do it but I don't appreciate it."_

"I'm not doing that to hurt you," I said, "I'm trying to get you to get over what you've been through."

"You treat me like I'm a toddler," she added.

"I do not," I defended.

"Really? The 'time out' wasn't treating me like a toddler?"

"You hurt Tori," I pointed out, "I saw the look on her face."

 **"Okay I'm not even going to speak to the hypocrisy of what you just said," Jade replied, "But that just pissed me off even more!"**

 _"I get it," Beck said, "But I get so frustrated I don't know what else to do. Yes, I know I shouldn't act hurtful. I know that it's wrong but at the time I feel like I see something wrong and I have to fix it."_

 _"Why do you have to fix it," Jade asked, "and how is your behavior fixing it?"_

 _"It's the best thing I can think of at the time," Beck said as if that made it okay._

 _"Beck," I said, "Put yourself in my shoes. How would you feel?"_

 _Normally he would make a joke about that but today he didn't._

 _"I guess I would feel pretty bad," he admitted, "But am I not supposed to support my friends?"_

 _"Not to the exclusion of me," I said._

 _"You're so needy," Beck told me, "I sometimes feel like you hold on to me too tightly."_

 _"Because I'm afraid to lose you."_

 **That revolution was a shock. I never knew Jade to be afraid of anything.**

 _"I didn't know that," I said._

 _"I know you didn't know that. I should have told you. I am just as responsible as you are."_

 _"Yeah but at the same time I should have let you talk. I was too busy trying to be in control. Look I suggest that we start over."_

 **"No," Jade said, "Beck I love you but we are** **not** **good together and because we're not good together I think we're better off being friends."**

 _"Is that really what you want," Beck asked._

 _No. It wasn't what I wanted but it was what I needed._

 _"At least for now," I said, "How about we take a break. At the end we'll talk about it and decide if we are able to salvage our relationship."_

 _"Okay," Beck said, "How long should the break be?"_

 _"6 months," I said._

 _"Okay," Beck said, "I promise I won't date again until the end of that time if we decide not to get back together."_

 _"And I promise that too," I said._

 _I hugged him._

 _"I love you Beck," I said._

 _"I love you too Jade," he told me._

 _Than he walked out. It was over and the funny thing is I felt better then I had in years._

 _I prayed our love would be strong enough to survive. I had to trust that it would._


End file.
